As the proud owner of a pink calf, two alien cows, several clumsy reindeer, numerous elf gnomes and a horrifying number of holiday decorations, I can say that what my best friend pointed up the other day is sadly, all too true: I’m a Farmville hoarder.
The ASPCA or 4-H might come and do something to me for animal cruelty. Look how these poor animals are packed in next to Christmas decorations and a thicket of elf gnomes. I am rapidly collecting enough snowmen to make a snowman fence. My holiday tree exploded with presents several days ago. I’m waiting for some type of stern warning from the Farmville crew that I can’t cram one single more thing onto my already-largest sized farm.
What is Farmville? An evil Facebook game is what is Farmville. I usually use my computer with the sound off. If I turn the sounds on, comfortingly folksy music plays and the animals make all their barnyard noises. With the number of animals I have – a LOT of barnyard squeals and honks and clucks and oinks. And baaa-baaaa’s and mooos and neighs.
Here is just one small corner of the Amy Sterling Farmville Farm. It took me over an hour to harvest, plough, plant and place hoarded items this morning. Down there in the corner you can see the “lighted hedge posts” – those are a new addition, and that snowpile next to the sign? That’s got an animated cow in it, and if you’re actually on Farmville and visiting my farm, you can see his legs kick. That little brown sign reads “Hoarder!”
I really think I need some type of intervention. It’s going to kill me to sell all this stuff off after the holidays. This is like my own holiday stuff. I made a vow two years ago to not buy any new holiday items.
I managed to keep that vow through one holiday season. I was shopping in Borders for Christmas gifts a couple of weeks ago. Their items were on sale! So therefore I brought home another garland, a plastic tree, and an aqua glittery reindeer. At least he’s not a “clumsy” reindeer. I keep collecting those because . . . I . . . I’m a hoarder. That’s right. My name is Amy . . . and I’m a Farmville Hoarder. I acknowledge that there is a higher power. So I’m right there, at the first step.